Lesley: Mirrors and Anvils

My daughter has begun taking dance classes at a local studio. There are mirrors everywhere. 

Boy, oh boy. What a shock to the system to look up and not realize that person you see across the room is your own reflection...because you are even larger than you realized. 

I'll be honest. I lost momentum after a few days. I stopped wearing my fitbit, and caring about food choices. (We're not even going to talk about exercise.) 

Tonight was a much-needed wake up call. I've been feeling crappy (mentally and physically) for so long and then today I actually did not recognize myself. Talk about an anvil. 

I've been a shell of myself (albeit a hulking one, lol) for so long that I guess I shouldn't be surprised. Still, it really hit home that I've lost me (thanks to depression) and if I want any chance of ever again finding that creative, happy girl who was so full of life then I have to get healthy. 

ASAP. 

Emily Day 3

So far, so good. I wont pretend that its been perfect, but I'm making progress. That's honestly all i care about. The first day was hard. My eating wasn't great. I ate some junk. Yesterday was better. Today is going well.
In the past, I've struggled for the first 4 days. I'm being gentle with myself as I make this transition.
Another thing i noticed before is that i spend the first few days peeing like crazy. I got up twice last night and I don't normally get up to pee. Ive gone 6 times today and will probably go 2-3 more times before the day is through. My typical number of pee breaks is 4-5 each day.
I often struggle to eat or drink enough. While I'm transitioning off starch and sugar, I'm also trying to gradually increase my water consumption. I need to improve my meal planning and follow through with cooking and eating as well.
I am feeling energetic and happy. I haven't been hungry. I've worked out every day so far. I'm excited to be doing this!

Lesley: Day 1

6,784 steps.

I did it! I met (and passed!) my exercise goal of 6,500 steps :D I'm pretty damn pleased with myself.

Calorie-wise, I could have --and will -- do better, but today wasn't bad at all, for starting out.

"Tomorrow is fresh, with no mistakes!!"

Lesley: Tomorrow's the Day

For me, anyway. (I think maybe it's tomorrow for you, too, Em?)

I didn't do any exercising today as I have been babying a blister on my foot from yesterday and a hangover headache from a vodka-soaked last night, lol. Honestly, I've spent the entire day looking forward to bedtime just so I can sleep this is off. I can't say as I'm sorry that there's no alcohol in my near future.

Tomorrow I will be walking enough to hit my goal of 6500 steps and counting calories/keeping a food journal. I've decided to do that at My Fitness Pal. I'll post a link to my profile there. I need to try and remember where my FitBit is so I can get it charged. No idea where it is :-/

Yesterday was AMAZING. The weather was gorgeous and as usual the energy was awe-inspiring and humbling. I can't wait for the 2015 Challenge!! I'm including some pictures below...

Fabulous turnout as usual!! Over $1 million raised.

This part of the race is always so emotional.

<3

Not so bad for being so out of shape!

Posted with Blogsy

Emily's Game Plan

I'm so ready! Let's do this!!

Fitness/Exercise: A cute guy keeps inviting me to the gym... I WANT to go, but I won't pay for a membership unless I'm already in the habit of working out. I'm cheap thrifty and I don't want to pay for something until I know I'll use it. I've worked out at home every day this week except Thursday (I ran errands instead - the grocery bags were almost heavy enough to count it! Haha!).

Going forward, I'm going to do exercise DVD's at home until it's a habit and then I'll join Mr. Hottie Pants at the gym. I'll constantly evaluate my fitness level and endurance so that my workouts aren't becoming stagnant.

Food: I'm planning to limit starch and sugar. I've already eliminated gluten, which is half the battle.  I plan to eat primarily protein, vegetables, and healthy fats. I'll indulge my occasional sweet tooth with fruit. I won't eat artificial sweeteners or processed foods. I will include dairy, but I intend to gradually decrease my dairy consumption. I know from past experience that eating several small meals is effective for me and that tracking my meals and counting calories will just slow me down. I'll eat until I'm full and call that good enough. I'm also going to drink more water.

Goals: Well, my ultimate goal is a whopping 130 pounds, but I'll focus on mini-goals as I go.

Rewards: I'm still working on this one. The plan is to reward myself after each 13 pound loss, with larger rewards at certain milestones. More details to come, I guess!

Emily's Story

Shit's about to get real...

As a child, I was underweight. As in: regularly checked for malnutrition. I cried every time I had blood drawn. I was active and bright and I wasn't delayed - I was just tiny. In about third grade, I started to catch up with my peers. By middle school, I was chubby. And I only got bigger from there.

Eight years ago, I got serious about weight loss. I quickly lost 30 pounds and plateaued. I was so motivated while I was losing, but I couldn't find my way past the block. I maintained that loss for about 6 months. At that time, my dad nearly died (more on that below), I had some relationship issues, and my job got really stressful. Something had to give, and unfortunately my healthy habits were the first thing on the chopping block. Over the course of the next year, I gained back all 30 pounds that I'd lost. And more. And some more after that. In fact, I ended up 60 pounds over my previous "heavy" weight.

I haven't dieted since. I've eliminated food groups from time to time, though. The first was dairy products. I did feel better, but nothing significant, so I didn't withhold cheese for long.

About 18 months ago, I started noticing an intolerance to gluten. I had all of the typical symptoms, so in June of 2013, I cut it out. And DANG! I felt better than I had in years! No more diarrhea, back pain, acne, or sensitive skin. My headaches were significantly reduced and my migraines were almost completely eliminated. I also lost 30 pounds without trying.

BTW, it was harder to give up cheese than it was to give up gluten!

Since I've never been a "normal" weight, I don't know what it's like to live in an attractive body. I absolutely do want to look better (and wear cuter clothes!), but my motivation is health.

My dad developed Type 2 diabetes in his early 20's. He lived in denial for many years. He eventually started losing his sight and started seeking help at that point. After some blood tests, his doctor called and told him to go to the hospital immediately. He'd been having small heart attacks and didn't realize it and his kidneys were failing. He had a quintuple bypass about a week later and then began dialysis. He received a donor kidney eight years ago and takes better care of himself now than he ever did before...

My dad is great, but I don't want to follow in his footsteps. I refuse to live in denial. I want more from life than I can reasonably expect if I continue as I am.

And so I begin! Glad to have Lesley here with me as we get healthy!

Lesley's Game Plan

I am a horrible one for saying "I'll start tomorrow" and then tomorrow rolls around, I don't start...and again push it off to the next day. 

Fitness/Exercise:

This time, I mean it. I'm kicking off my exercise tomorrow with the Dempsey Challenge. This is my 6th year participating, and since I will be walking 6.2 miles, I thought that would be the perfect beginning. I'll be starting strong! LOL.  

My fitness plan going forward from there is to start wearing my FitBit One (again) and achieve at least 6,500 steps a day for the first week following. Then I will increase to 7,000 steps the next week, and add a 1,000 more each week after until I'm at 10,000 steps/day. Once I've been consistently achieving that for a few weeks, I'll reevaluate whether that is working well for me or if I need to try something different.

Food:

As far as food, I will continue on with my gluten-free lifestyle (more about that in another post), but on Sunday (9/28),  I also will begin measuring servings, counting calories, and keeping a food journal, as well as giving up alcohol for the near future. I'm not an alcoholic, but I do like my calorific nightcap on occasion. Lol.  (I'm drinking wine as a write this entry.)

I'm not sure where I will be logging my food journal entries just yet. I'm considering MyFitnessPal. The FitBit website has a food journal too. We'll see. 

Goals:

While my ultimate weight loss goal is about 80 pounds, I'm setting mini goals so I don't get overwhelmed. 

Rewards: 

Starting with the first FIVE pounds lost, I get to buy myself a little present. After that, it's every 10 pounds lost. 

Reward schedule:

1.  5    pounds down
2. 15    "            "
3. 25    "            "
4. 35    "            "
5. 45    "            "
6. 55    "            "
7. 65    "            "
8. 75    "            "

--and then--

• 80 --- GOAL!!!! (big present)

I've been wanting to start an Alex and Ani collection (didn't I mention before I like nice things??), so I think my first several rewards will be bracelets of theirs. The first of which will be:

The phoenix, a mythical and sacred firebird, is known to rise from its ashes in regeneration. With strong wings to soar to great heights, it represents a new life filled with opportunity. An emblem of divinity and immortality, the Phoenix Charm reminds us that change is good for the soul. 

 

Rise from the ashes. A new life filled with opportunity. 

Check, and check! This is a perfect symbol of the journey that Emily and I are on, and the perfect thing to be wearing to remind me to keep on keeping on. 

So, that's my game plan. I'm hoping to add a widget to the sidebar for steps taken, but it may end up being miles. It's not looking like FitBit has widgets, so I will have to export my data out to another site. 

Lamepants. 

Lesley's Story

I've been sitting here for thirty minutes watching the cursor blink while trying to figure out how to begin this entry. First impressions, and all. (Well, first impressions if you are reading this and you aren't Emily, lol. She already knows me...and likes me despite my self-absorbed and bitchy tendencies. Ha.)

I guess since I've outed myself, I'll just go on and tell it like it is.

I'm fat.

Obese, actually, and completely miserable. I'm not one of those women who chirps about the fat acceptance movement and continues merrily on her way. For myself, I do not accept being fat, even if up until this point, I've done little to change that about myself lately.

Maybe this is because I haven't always been overweight. I am in my thirties and have battled my weight just three times in my life (and the first of which was after pregnancy, so that doesn't count, lol). The other two times were gains thanks to antidepressants (Celexa) and lasted over a period of at least two years.

This time has been the worst. I am the heaviest I have ever been in my life; 20 pounds heavier than the day I delivered my daughter, and 75 pounds heavier than my healthy weight. Not only that, but I haven't been taking Celexa since November 2013. The drug may have caused me to pack on the pounds, but enough time has passed that I can't lay blame wholly on it alone anymore.

I'm not going to lie. I'm a relatively vain individual. I like to look nice...clothes, makeup, hair. As someone who spent most of her life at a healthy size, being overweight has definitely not helped my depression. Most of 2014 has been spent at home in my husband's sweatpants and t-shirts, hair pulled back in a messy knot, and not a stitch of makeup. When I did leave the house, I'd swap the sweatpants for the only pair of jeans I have that fit.

While I want to look better,  it is actually not the motivation behind wanting to lose weight. The motivation is my health. I want to feel better. I want to be able to walk upstairs with a load of laundry and not have my heart pounding in my chest because I'm so out of shape. I want to be able to sleep on my stomach and not have to hike one of my knees practically up to my boobs to get comfortable. I want to stop snoring. I want to not sweat when I'm just loading the dishwasher.

I want to live beyond my 50's. My 60's and 70's. Hell, my 80's! (More about this in another post.)

I want so much more for myself than my current weight and habits allow.

I'm finally mentally ready to make the changes necessary and start on my journey to fabulousness *grin*  Luckily, I don't have to do it alone, and I'm so grateful for that.

Healthy here I -- no, we -- come!